Friday, May 11, 2012

Some thoughts I must share.

Again, I love Brene Brown and I read her blog and love every post.
Today she quoted Harriet Lerner and it was powerful for me so I thought I would share it with you.

"If we would only listen with the same passion that we feel about wanting to be heard."
-Harriet Lerner

This hit me.  When going through a divorce you are use a lot of phrases like "I don't feel heard or I don't feel listened to." and "Please just listen to me, just let me speak without interruption."  Still you are so worried about being heard and understood that you can't hear anything else even if you do not interrupt you are thinking of what you are going to say when the other person is done.  One of the main problems in marriages is that we aren't listening to our partners.  Not only to their words but to their unspoken words.  This breaks my heart.  I know I can do better.  Right when I get to a space where I think pain has passed because of the better space I am in I can just see my mistakes more clearly and what I could have done differently and then enters the pain again.

I haven't read any of Harriet's books but it sounds like I need to.

Seriously, life is a crazy roller coaster.  Today I just need to focus on today and attempt not to think about yesterday and tomorrow.


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