Thursday, December 13, 2012

Random list of things I love.

Corner Bakery
New Girl (Seriously so funny)
Kettle Corn
Dried Mango
Sesame Honey Cashews
Christmas lights

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Stop, look, listen to your heart.

(Anyone know that song?  I love it)

In case you didn't know I am a Human Resource Manager for an Engineering Company.
Yes my life is that romantic and glamorous.
Actually I like my job and the company I work for.

One of the many things I do is deal with health insurance which I do not like at all as I'm sure you all will understand.  There is a term called a "Qualifying Life Event" (QLE) which means if a birth, adoption, death, divorce, or marriage happens anytime to you during the year you can change your health insurance plan without having to wait for the open enrollment period.  Open enrollment typically only happens one time per year so to trump open enrollment it has to be a serious life event.

That QLE list looks very familiar to me and when one happens you literally have to:
Stop what you are doing.
Look around you and assess the damage or changes.
Listen to your heart and tune out what the world thinks is best for you.

And then proceed, probably with caution, and repeat those steps when needed. (lather, rinse, repeat)

This year has been one crazy year.  It has had extreme highs and extreme lows.
The path that I started out on at the beginning of the year is not the same path I am on now.  What I have tried to do is take each day one at a time and be aware that the next day could be completely different.  What each of my QLEs has done for me is shine a new, bright light on my life and helped me to assess and see what is important and what is not and what I want in my future.

What seemed like the right thing at the beginning of 2012 is not the right thing for me anymore and I am OK with that because I have learned a lot and I feel I have become a better person which I think is the most important thing.  Instead of fighting it and being stubborn and trying to prove something I am embracing what I feel to be right no matter the judgement, eye rolling, giggling, and ridicule that comes my way.  I am on my life path and no one else's.  I have prayed for guidance and why pray for it if you aren't going to listen to it.  Instead of ignoring the signs in my life and am looking a head with my eyes and heart wide open.  It is scary but worth it.

I am not going to say it's not hard.  It is hard to live a life where so many people know all your dirt and get to judge and comment and make their own assessments.  If I dwell on it too long it will crush me so I choose to not worry about things I can't control.

What I can control is how I act.  I have learned a great deal about allowing other people their journey through their own life.  I believe we are living to learn and grow and become better people.  Judging or shaming people through their process stunts them.

Wow, this is a much wordier post then I planned.

My point is:  When those in your life have a "Qualifying Life Event" cut them some slack and know that their world is changing and what was important may not be important anymore so no judging just loving.

The end.


Thursday, December 6, 2012

Tag out.

I have had a couple bad mom days.
Just screaming and running around and the never ending messy house.
My patience has left me.  I hate when patience leaves because when it does it tags in comparison and I really hate fighting comparison.
I start viewing everyone's life as glamorous hay days of fun time adventures with perfect hair, clothes, makeup and of course the cutest shabby chic-ly decorated home that is all pinterested and liked a million times while my life is on this never ending cycle of running around to work, school, babysitters and grocery stores while wearing flats since that is what sane mothers with small kids can really only wear but apparently is just not stylish enough.

And why is it that when you are a mom it feels like you are at the grocery store 90% of your life????  Is it just me?

What women really need is not the third arm but the ability to function with no sleep.  When a woman becomes a mother she should never have to sleep again.  Seriously, if women didn't have to sleep all the problems of the world would be solved.  The possibilities are endless with what I could do with those 12 hours that my children sleep.  Just dreaming about it makes me shake my fist at heaven and wonder why it isn't so.

Did I mention I love these kids so much that when I think about losing my patience with them makes my heartbreak?
Being a mom is freakin' hard.

And of course totally worth it.
Alas, I should get some sleep so I can get patience tagged back in.

Good morning.
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